Are you looking for the perfect job?
Not happy at work? In between jobs? Just seeking a happier workplace? Mary is in her 40’s and has recently moved to Singapore. She quit her job in the financial services back home in the US to follow her husband’s career to Singapore. For the first time post graduation, she is not working. Although she could start looking for a job, she is choosing not to. She wants to “explore” what she really loves doing. For awhile now, she has not been happy in her current profession.
More clients than ever before, now seek a Coach, looking to change their career to find work they love. First of all, I want to mention that as a coach, my responsibility is not to find her that perfect company/job but to actually guide her into a process of self discovery as to what she needs to be to tap into the “flow” of work.
What I admired was her passion about “not compromising’ – “I want to be happy when I am at work”. Not many articulate it let alone pursue it. We believe at some level that “work is practical” and pays the bills and we don’t even explore what’s out there.
What about you? How do you feel? Do you wish you had a more fulfilling job that made you happy? Do you feel the need to refocus in your career? Are you looking for a ‘perfect” job?
If you are, I am offering some tips - use them in your life as you will - maybe they might shed some light on your “dream job”.
Some tips:
As a coach, we did a really great exercise that is simple “Love and Hate” – what do you love about your job and what do you hate ? That kind of gives you an indication of what you ought to be looking for. for eg: I love coaching per se but don’t really enjoy the back end administrative jobs. If you look at a post for recruiting, you need to love almost all the “main responsibilities’ of the job.
Choose a career that is congruent with your values. What do you deeply care about? How would you like to bring that into your workplace? Do you believe the value of contribution is important? Or new learning? What beliefs do you hold about that? How do you express these values? I mean, if you have stopped looking for status, money, glamor, the outside forces, then what roles and careers would satisfy your top three values? As a Coach, I have seen clients make some pretty awesome discoveries!
We also turned to the unconscious – but in a concrete way. My client was open to visualisation and meditation. We did a guided meditation where she met her ‘future self” and her ‘past self” and she dialoged between them asking and giving advice. I particularly like this because it lets us see the future self who can look back at the decision and bring the passage of time perspective. And the younger self can also be quite idealistic. This was quite revealing to her as both selves told her to ‘persevere in her path”.
A Personal SWOT helps to think about careers in terms of their strengths—and identify potentially “transferable” strengths. This exercise also takes a bigger picture look identifying potential opportunities and threats, which can be extremely informative. I love this. If you move with your strengths, then work will be easier. If you are an introvert, finding a customer service job may not be for you!
Finally, enquiring about the inner child was very powerful. “What did you love to do as a child?” then “What about that did you love?” or “As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?” then “What about that still appeals to you, and what doesn’t?” A perfect job is what you loved doing and our childhood gives us a good glimpse into that.
It’s also important to try new things – My clients and I brainstormed – “10 ideas that are too far-out as a career for me”. It opened up some new insights – as a couple of times, my client was delighted that there was so much out there she hadn’t yet explored. I might add that all these exercises and conversations have no barriers or limitations of right and wrong. The minute judgement comes into the conversation, the “should” “must” “have to” start ruining the creative flow and then we go to “the job others want us to have”.
So, what happens when you approach a friend or a family for this discussion? Or someone approaches you? Often we shut down communication by telling the person “they already have a great job” or “there is no such thing”. A coach will have no agenda and starts a process of enquiry into the real you.
I might add this as a coach, I loved this process myself - I love seeing clients bring new discoveries and create new possibilities for themselves. In a coaching session, the client can be themselves and not feel the pressure to please others.
“Finding the perfect job” is all about a place in your life where you can be yourself anyway. It means you bring your unique talents, strengths and find a place where you can showcase them. It also involves an emotional acceptance that this is work where you are valued and cherished.
Of course, the truth is often we already know what we love doing the most in the world. If you are not doing that, the question to ask might be “ why not?’